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 I know it is not an energy drink. I think the Energy Drink Industry has done a great job of branding the 8oz bullet can. And the C+Swiss can tricked me. This has been sitting in my refrigerator for a couple months now. Wondering if I should review it or just drink it.
Then I started to wonder. Why would someone make a Hemp Iced Tea in the first place? Yes, hemp and it’s seeds do not have enough TCH to get you high (less then 10ppm). And hemp is NOT marijuana, but I think most of the world assumes it is. Then some hemp profiteers (C+Swiss with “Hemp” leaf on can) make products that make you think you are going to screw the man by using a hemp product that by some legal loop hole, you can use. Not true.
Apparently hemp is one of the healthiest foods out there. Hemp seeds are rich in high quality protein. Hemp has been slowly booming in the Vegan markets as an alternative food. I on the other hand like a filet mignon, baked potato with sour cream and bacon.
So what does it taste like? I don’t know why the hell they would make a hemp iced tea. But my initial reaction is it tastes like crap. Crap being used to describe “not good” not actual feces. It really tastes like grass and ashes. Real harsh tasting. It is actually making me gag. I have tears coming out of my eyes from wanting to vomit ( I am drinking it while I write this). Just smelling it makes me want to throw up. 3 sips, and I am done. This is has to be the worst drink in the world. I love iced teas, but what the hell were they thinking when they made this drink? Maybe, just maybe they were smoking pot when the brainiac came up with this collaboration. I am going to be 100% honest here. 70% of the world will probably not believe this. But I have never smoked marijuana in my life. And if I were to be presumptuous, I would presume that C+Swiss tastes like bong water right after a frat party. Hell, that probably tastes better the C+Swiss. I would avoid this drink at all costs. Unless you like the taste of burnt hay. Then go for it. www.c-swiss.us |
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Penis Enlarging Energy Drinks |
 Penis enlarging energy drinks??? What did you say? What is going on with the energy market nowadays? FDA is worried about the little things like the name Cocaine? Or powdered energy drink that is to look like cocaine called Blow? But they don't care that you can increase your penis size for the price of a energy drink? OUTRAGOUS! I say! It costs like 5 grand for a boob job, but to enlarge your penis…. Only $2.50???
Well for the sake of science. I decided to let our loyal readers read about my experience with ExtenZe the male enhancing energy drink. As you all might be wondering…. I am not endowed or ashamed of my manhood. So drinking one drink could not affect my perfectly tuned cog. So here it goes…
I slowly cracked the seal of the big red can as my lips gently touched the rim of the can. I slowly felt the cold quenching juices flow in my mouth. My lips quivered as if I felt many emotions at the same time. Happiness, thirst, energy. After a couple deep gulps of the frosty beverage. I felt like a new man.
In the mean time I had to go cook dinner for the family. And all of a sudden, my 4 year old son knocked over my brand new can of ExtenZe: Male Enhancement energy drink on the floor. I was only able to salvage 20% of the drink. But my dreams of a large penis were over! I wept as the juices stained my carpet. So my science project was OVER! I did not know if I should spank my son, or my wife. Confusion swept me.
Conclusion: No "Hard" facts about my penis getting larger. But I am happy to report the carpet on my floor did grow 3 inches.
The real energy drink review is here . |
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We here at Drinkaddict are proud to be honest connoisseurs of all things energy drink related. We have previously covered energy powders, energy slurpees, energy gum and now thanks to our friends at Hansen the fine makers of the Monster Energy products we get to the pleasure of covering condoms. That’s not one of my usual typos that is really condoms with the famous Monster logo. Now I’m a big fan of most of the Monster products (with the exception of Heavy Metal because it’s nasty) but this one is kinda weird. Why would Monster put their logo on a condom, since they do not return emails I have the permission to speculate. Since I have not actually seen them or had the pleasure of using them I’ m going to assume there is nothing special about them but I can come up with a few ideas the I will gently slide into this article. How about a “M” logo on the condom itself, kind of a one man billboard. Perhaps maybe an energy lubricant because lets face some people could use a little extra energy in certain situations. Do they come in different sizes perhaps a “BFC”? or the shooter size for those at Bevnet (jk Bevnet just ribbing ya). Can we get them in flavors so maybe I can finally coax someone into...well trying one! Realistically I’m sure this is just a promotional product Monster casually stuck their logo on. Since I have not boned up on my advertisement research I’m guessing a bunch of professionals got into a circle and some jerk thought this idea was good. It isn’t good, its great pulling this idea out of the crevasses of ones head is simply genius. I wood love to see more stuff like this pummel the market and give the competition the spanking it needs to be innovative for the benefit of us average but anal consumers. |
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